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Crushing In a Relationship

Started by linoralow · 8 months ago

I have a story.
I have this friend of mine in school, whom I shall name as Yowanda (don’t ask me why I picked this name but I did, because every other name that came to my head was too close to a real person). This was years ago, and what happened was she got into [...] ... Continue reading »

11 comments

  • EstherChin

    1 year ago

    noting new to me.
    reply
  • EstherChin

    1 year ago

    heartbreaking, but this kind of stuff happens a lot.
    *sigh*

    and they call it 'serious relationship'
    -.-'
    reply
  • Nicholas.C

    1 year ago

    In the girls defense (yes i know this isn't going to be popular), we are all human, and despite our best intentions, sometimes our hearts just wonder off and want their own way...

    But really, don't you think the girl really does love her boyfriend despite the crush? A crush is after just that, a fluttering of the heart, something superficial, an evolutionary device designed to nudge us along the path of procreation.

    To love is something beyond the grain of our instincts, beyond biology and chemistry, it's the willful decision we consciously make to still care for another long after the glitter and fuzzy feelings of being in love has faded...

    So in this case, Yowanda's heart may have wondered, but her love is true, no?
    reply
  • linoralow

    1 year ago

    Esther Chin: Sorry if you have experienced it or heard about it babes. It's a sad thing and stuff like that can happens. I just question why even get into a relationship if the couple doesn't even want it to be serious.

    Nicholas C: Granted the girl can have some defense, but in my own thoughts, if i were to ever ever do that, I don't think i'd be forgiven. To me if another person crushes over another while in a relationship, the persons fancies over someone else who is not the person you are suppose to have those feelings towards. Call me selfish, but when I am with someone, I would like all their affection, love and mushy thoughts, all catered to me and not someone else.
    How would you or anyone like it if, one day the person you love says, "Hon.. I really like Y". It just makes me sick and the love a tad bit untrue. If your heart can wander isn't there the likelihood all relationships are doomed?
    reply
  • pamsong

    1 year ago

    I agree. ONE HUNDRED PERCENT!!! Don't they dare say they love us if they can even look longingly in the direction of another!
    reply
  • linoralow

    1 year ago

    pamsong: right right? I mean how can they do that. it's just so heartbreaking and emotionally painful.
    reply
  • Nicholas.C

    1 year ago

    Well, I guess we all want to be selfish when it comes to love and in a perfect world we would all be straight and narrow.

    But that isn't the world we live in. Not to say that we shouldn't strive towards unyielding faith, but it's reality that we're all only mortal and to deny it is foolhardy.

    And having seen so many relationships fail for reasons that are superficial at best, wouldn't you rather have someone who was honest about his/her failings but who loved you rather than someone who simply seems to love you but doesn't?

    And don't tell me you want someone who is always true, because that person doesn't exist.
    reply
  • 3POINT8

    1 year ago

    "I love you"
    Isn't that the 3 words everyone is dying to hear?

    Then again, I've heard of relationship failing because one of party nvr used said this to another...
    reply
  • lankapo

    1 year ago

    hi,
    normal lor, when you are lonely of course you will tend to have an affair.:)

    A friend of mine, so in love in during university life for 4 years. After finish study, each of them married other people.

    As long as you are still boyfriend and girlfriend, fall in love,break up,flirting and etc are normal.

    But when you are married, then it's totally a different case :)
    reply
  • Richard

    1 year ago

    everthing that Aronil said is right. I strongly agree with her. Loves each other must face the tough time and lonely moment, this is the test between them whether they are still love each other. Also there is no backup or spare tyre in relationship, i strongly agree with that becoz i am also a victim of spare tyre and pretty disappointed.
    reply
  • linoralow

    1 year ago

    Been a while since I replied:
    Nicholas: On the contrary, I believe that if you're heart really is true, and you both look towards the same goals and beliefs, there is the HOPE that there is someone out there for you that will remain true to you. There's a grey area in this, on the whole honesty as the best policy in this context. But I shall maintain, that no one who loves another person would even try to consider having a fling or going to another person...And as much as they can tease on it, I'm quite happy to say that the person I'm with is true to me and he wouldn't hurt me in that manner. :)

    3point8: Sure people like hearing it, but why have someone say "I love you" when they don't mean it? It depends though don't you think, when it's the right time to say I love you. Though I like saying it irregardless of the timing. :)

    Lankapo: You have a point there. But I think even marriage doesn't usually mean that there is a chance the other won't cheat. They just probably won't because it'll be too costly in terms of monetary values :P.

    Richard: Hey Richard thanks for popping by. Sorry to hear that you went through a painful ordeal like that. It's a rough road the this things called love...but as humans love is the thing that holds us together. I hope that you find someone that you can share the love journey with :)
    reply

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